Man, do I wish my brain had an off switch right about now. It seems to be running on overdrive lately. I think so hard and so much during the day that I go to bed with a headache at night. There are so many decisions to make, and time is running out! Open ended decisions drive me crazy...their presence just looms over me like a rain cloud. It's depressing. And it's like for every decision I miraculously do make, another one is waiting in the wings, ready to take it's place...it makes me want to yell:
And for the record, we're not talking small potatoes, everyday decisions like, "Do I want to use Creme Brulee or Vanilla Cinnamon creamer in my coffee this morning?" (it's usually Creme Brulee...pretty easy choice, really) or, "Does Cam need a bath tonight?" (the answer to that is usually "yes," so then the question becomes, "Do I have enough energy to give him a bath tonight?") But the questions that I can't seem to produce and answer for are things like, "Where are we going to store all our stuff during the deployment?" and "Are Cam and I going to fly home and spend more money, or drive with Josh and save money, but use up extra vacation days?" and "What are we going to name our child?" Yikes!! Yeah, kind of important, big-deal type stuff. I hate not having a plan. It makes me feel out of control...and I like to be in control! I don't like it when things don't go exactly according to plan, but it at least makes me feel a little better when there is actually a plan in place!
Anyway, sorry for the whiny post. I just felt like I had to get some things out into cyber-space, I guess...just vent a little. Somehow it helps me not feel so overwhelmed. I know it's not Thursday yet, but I needed to remind myself that "It's OK" a little early this week!